Tag Archives: worst things

Things that make you Cry and Laugh at the same time

One thing is life for sure.

I hope your life is funny, sunny, bitter and sweet at the same time. That’s a life worth living.

But other than Life, there are moments littered in our every day that possess the same powerful effect, that could make you laugh and cry at the same time:

A Good Read. A book that speaks to you through its volumes of a past experience, a deep ache within. Or maybe one that offers a window to someone else’s life, a life so helpless and fragile, and yet you could not reach out to help in any way. You laugh because you can imagine its simple sweetness, and you cry for all the unfairness suffered.

A Decade-old Photo. When you see your smooth, oval face and the spotless laugh that knew no troubles; oh how you hate and love at the same time! Love for the moment you had, and hate that it is long over. Pleaseeee get over the bitterness and be grateful that you were enriched by such beautiful experiences! (:

A Cup of Coffee. You could be having it alone, or perhaps as a friendly brew with an old acquaintance; anyhow, caffeine is a great brain stimulant, and at times it could work just as well even for the tear ducts! Say if you were sharing a private joke (even just to yourself) and you burnt your tongue while chuckling quietly.

Very likely.

An Unwilling Lesson Learnt. That was what happened to me today. I was bringing my parents out for a day trip, our usual food-hunt, and I envisioned a relaxing stroll after a delicious meal.

To my own grievous fault (heh), it became a stressful roundabout walk, long hours of getting lost, and a set of tired and grumpy parents, carrying two pairs of feet that were more tired and grumpy than anything ):

It was really my fault. Not only did I walk too fast, I was way too impatient in finding my way around, indecisive about what to do, and too stubborn to take any advice.

You know I thought I changed! I used to be a panicky drowning-duck-in-the-pond type of person, and I really, really thought I shook that off already. I thought that I have learnt to carry myself in a confident, relaxed way. I was so wrong! I am still the worried little girl trying so hard to prove myself. 

After all these years, I am still the same in so many ways. What a downer.

I guess one improvement is that I don’t sulk out loud and pretend nothing’s wrong anymore. I shed a few quiet tears, and as I thought back about the frantic walking we did, I actually managed to laugh out. AT myself.

There you go, crying and laughing at the same time!

How could I be so wrong, thinking that I’m all good and grown now. How you surprise me, oh G.

Advertisements
Tagged , , ,

You will always be a one hit wonder

Don’t you think that we can be such stubborn creatures always?

Our itchy hearts always, always want something new.

Not that they are bad, but maybe we are disillusioned about their benefits. Sometimes they are not good for us.

Or maybe it is simply not the right time.

“I shall not want.”

It is so much easier said than done, but to call it quits before trying is a coward. Don’t b e like that! Face the music and carry on. Try to be patient and kind, and wait for it to come to you, all in good time (:

Tagged ,

The best way to kill a read

The most effective way to kill a good read is to read it really, really fast. Joel calls that being a “speed freak”.

But it isn’t really my fault, not really. The book is just so, so sad. I had to kill it before it kills me. Sorry Bookie, my life is more real to me than yours. I am so sorry you had to die such an unglamorous death.

Like Joel said, I fulfilled my “freaky nature” by exploding through the book at the top speed. Two-lines-per-second. My eyes were blurry as it skimmed the alphabets, barely registering a verb, an adjective, not even a word, they were all a jumble of alphabets, or closer to nothing, because before I could “see” the letter a I have already skipped forward to n and then it was y and another word that began with t.

Names were my speed bumps, I would pause at the word “Norah” “David” “Paul” (if they happened to register); inverted commas which signaled conversations caught my attention. A truly tiring way to read.

But tell me if you can, that it is not sad, to keep a secret from your beloved wife! Tell me that it is not tragic to see a family fall apart because of one sore mistake!

Tell me that meaningless affairs are not heart-wrenching, and that you do not pity the man who lives a secret life behind his camera lens.

A talented boy who used music as an outlet for anger and leading his life out of defiance. Three persons’ sad memories intermingled into a rivers of bitterness and then an OCEAN of regrets.

The worst: a secret, a wrongful secret,i kept till the very last breath and taken to the deathbed: the injustice of it! And finally when it was all said and done the dust had already settled and there was nothing more to say, or do. The dead is gone and the living try their best to live again, live like they have never seen sadness.

OK, the ending wasn’t that bleak, but it might just have been, you know. Anyhow to me it doesn’t make up for the lost years and the decades of anguish, but really, it just teaches us that life still goes on, heedless of mundane human tragedies. No tragedy is too hard for Life to get over.

So tell me if you had such a book in your hand you would not dash through it, beat down the unhappy, stifling paragraphs and be done with it. It will take some time before i read it again!

Tagged ,

Not your way

I never knew how to deal with things that don’t go your way. In the process of getting better I create many casualties, the biggest being myself.

GAH!

Tagged

Strange ideas

I am going crazy.

Yesterday, in a fit of nothing-better-to-do, i actually got enticed by an image of a bubbly washing machine, to clean up my mac. There was an ad below the article i was reading that said “Clean up your Mac” with this cute little washing machine below:

I think I started thinking about bubbles, and cleaning things up (I love organising when I am stressed or bored) and I got inspired to hunt down the best programme to treat my Mac. I ended up spending 70bucks on Mackeeper. ARGHH!! I hate myself for being so random sometimes.

So I had a horrible night sleep tossing and turning about that money which could have been an awesome facial care product or a favourite dress. Or it could simply sit in my savings and make up those numbers that make me happy. Boy I think i hardly slept! When I woke up I felt oddly refresh. Perhaps morning chased away all the nighttime virus I am prone to contracting.

Being holed up at home is truly boring. So much so that it turned me into a one-day geek who bought an anti-virus! WTH! Who does that at 12am at night with nothing better to do? Me.

But I just realised that the Mackeeper guy reminds me of Eva (: That makes me feel better.

Did I ever mention that Walle-E could be the sweetest film I’ve ever watched? And Eva is absolutely so spicy and cute that you almost want to pinch her but the thought of getting a laser burn through your stomach kind of stops you from doing that. Plus she is frosty white and plastic; you will probably hurt your thumb from trying too hard.

But that doesn’t mean that I don’t love the crack-up Wall-E. He is five times dirtier and ten times dumber but that’s what makes him cute. Plus he has a good mechanical heart and batteries… and tons of luck. He reminds me of a mini catapillar.. you know those ladders you find in construction sites? And his output is uber cute.. paper cubes!! How random is that?!

But no matter how much I love the film, I don’t think I can stomach a Wall-E Paper Compost Birthday Cake. I found it randomly on Google. oh my god.. fans out there.. would you eat that?

 

(photo from www.coolest-birthday-cakes.com)

 

Tagged , , ,

Consider your future

Where should I put my head for the next part of my life? It is time to move on from the dingy office-admin-gov-reporting-stuffy atmosphere to something more free-roaming and challenging! I should not hesitate to crawl out of my little shell from here! *crawls slowly….*

*Leaves the shell…*

“creep to the mouth of the cave..*

the process of getting out of plato’s cave is an excrutiating one, becuase everyone around you will scorn “Why are you moving? Isn’t it a beautiful place? Isn’t it comfortable? Why suffer out there?” They will think that you are crazy and say discouraging stuff to make you gradually believe you are stupid too.

Then just at the moment when the tippy tips of our fingers were about to lift off from our old shell and depart and never come back, we cling on tighter, go back in and retreat. Deeper into the recesses than ever before. “Pull back!” our head screams. Our heart wrings in agony but the head doesn’t hear 😦

 

oh no!! Please do not let that happen to me. If Daryl can go off to New Zealand to pick cherries, so can I change my job. Compared to uprooting myself to down under to indulge in agricultural bliss, I think changing a job is a safe, sane and valid move on my part. (Though secretly inside I would love to pick cherries too.. I am so inspired by the travel shows on TV and I think I might just buy them off the rack if the series is available!)

 

Oh my goodness. I need a cheer to boost my ego and lighten my feet. I feel stuck, like my oversized boots are sinking into the murky mud. What a troublesome road life is!

 

I take that back. Love living, keep calm and have a gin fizz.

Always helps, especially when this one below is simply gorgeous:

Tagged , , ,

my throat HURTS

I really hate being sick!

I think the two worst everyday-feeling in the world are feeling SICK and feeling FAT.

and when you are like me now, both SICK and FAT, you just want to get better, you don’t really care if you’re fat. Sometimes you even eat stuff that you shouldn’t just to feel better. HECK! What a stupid cycle.

Dearest me, please stop tormenting yourself!

Get well soon ):

 

*hugs to me & J*

Tagged ,